I was writing a letter to my mother, when I felt a lot of emotions finding there way to the surface. I didn’t see her for quite a while, but that’s not the problem. The problem is I’m living in Amsterdam for a year now, life is starting to be a slur and I’m having trouble getting my work published. Everything in the world didn’t matter to me, except my writing. I would have sacrificed a son to God, if I had one. I couldn’t give up before my work gets the acknowledgement it deserves. Every sentence I wrote was full of frustration and anger. And there were many. Before I could finish it, the neighbours started arguing. And before I knew it the arguing turned into elaborated name-calling. I couldn’t concentrate anymore. I got up, lighted a cigarette, took my jacket and walked out of the door.
I was walking for a while when I saw that I was in the red-light district. The girls where throwing themselves at me.They promised me they would give me the best 30 minutes of my life. But I told them that I didn’t have time; so give it to someone else.When I walked further and was almost out of the red-light district. I saw this blond girl in a bikini. She was beautiful, great tits, great ass and a stunning face. She looked at me, lurking me with her eyes. She used her finger to tell me to come in. I was hypnotised by the red light. I saw myself walking towards her. She said: “for 50 Euros’ you can come in.” I stood in this little red bedroom. My toilet was bigger then this. This place stunk; it smelled like men’s hunger for woman. She closed the curtains, and said: “how do you want to fuck?” I said to her: “I don’t want that, I want to talk,” she laughed: “about what?” I said: “about everything” she said: “Okay.” And started talking about how shit her life was and blahblahblah. I didn’t know what she was talking about after a couple of minutes. I found her breast more interesting, and couldn’t stop looking at them. She stood up and started walking angry through the room. I really didn’t mind. The way she walked it was gorgeous.I looked at my watch and saw that there where 7 minutes over. I said to her: “Stop talking and spread your legs!”
I went home, sat at the table and finished my letter.
——- I went for a stroll today and met a girl. Not a girlfriend or anything. But we talked it was interesting. She talked about that she didn’t have future plans, how many mistakes she made in her life and she doesn’t enjoy having sex anymore. That’s right, she sells her body. After this conversation with her, I thought about the differences between her life and mine. And I just wanted to tell you, mother, that everything is going to be all right after all.